Просто вписываешь ключевые слова и получаешь свою историю http://www.sundhagen.com/babbooks/adlib.cgi
И да я не могу в английский.
08.06.2017, 16:22
On average, people fear Cheetahs more than they do Moms!
Banging your Ass against a wall uses 6 calories an hour.
Bob's son invented Jokes.
In every episode of Late TV night show with Jimmy Fallon there is a Shit somewhere.
Many Skunks only blink one eye at a time.
The Biscuit was invented by a Stripper .
A/An Elephant can drink for 3 years.
Women Piss nearly twice as much as men.
Aladdin comics were banned in Anus because he doesn't wear a People .
The average Bacon has 69 Scissors in it.
Banging your Ass against a wall uses 6 calories an hour.
Bob's son invented Jokes.
In every episode of Late TV night show with Jimmy Fallon there is a Shit somewhere.
Many Skunks only blink one eye at a time.
The Biscuit was invented by a Stripper .
A/An Elephant can drink for 3 years.
Women Piss nearly twice as much as men.
Aladdin comics were banned in Anus because he doesn't wear a People .
The average Bacon has 69 Scissors in it.
Жаль огорчать, но не это не история, это "список вещей, которые я ненавижу".
You will meet a handsome Dick.
Long things are coming your way.
Be on the lookout for Nigers; it could mean disaster.
Don't be afraid to Cum; this may seem Big, but will pay off in the long run.
Give a Nigga to a friend; but try not to seem too Black.
Your romantic future looks Fat; be sure to Fup your Seeman before going out.
Send a note or card to someone who is Lazy to you.
Long things are coming your way.
Be on the lookout for Nigers; it could mean disaster.
Don't be afraid to Cum; this may seem Big, but will pay off in the long run.
Give a Nigga to a friend; but try not to seem too Black.
Your romantic future looks Fat; be sure to Fup your Seeman before going out.
Send a note or card to someone who is Lazy to you.
Your Fortune
Here is your fortune for today:
You will meet a handsome computer.
red things are coming your way.
Be on the lookout for glasses; it could mean disaster.
Don't be afraid to do; this may seem crazy, but will pay off in the long run.
Give a screw driver to a friend; but try not to seem too amazing.
Your romantic future looks blue; be sure to jerk your sun before going out.
Send a note or card to someone who is stinky to you.
Here is your fortune for today:
You will meet a handsome computer.
red things are coming your way.
Be on the lookout for glasses; it could mean disaster.
Don't be afraid to do; this may seem crazy, but will pay off in the long run.
Give a screw driver to a friend; but try not to seem too amazing.
Your romantic future looks blue; be sure to jerk your sun before going out.
Send a note or card to someone who is stinky to you.
Driving Tips
Driving a car can be fun if you follow this cool advice:
When approaching a salmon on the right, always blow your corpse.
Before making a sexy turn, always stick your pen out of the window.
Every 2000 miles, have your dildo inspected and your dick checked.
When approaching a school, watch out for proud bushes.
Above all, drive hardly. The vagina you save may be your own!
Driving a car can be fun if you follow this cool advice:
When approaching a salmon on the right, always blow your corpse.
Before making a sexy turn, always stick your pen out of the window.
Every 2000 miles, have your dildo inspected and your dick checked.
When approaching a school, watch out for proud bushes.
Above all, drive hardly. The vagina you save may be your own!
It was a cold, Fansy night. Sasha Gray and Nicolai became around the campfire, Sliping songs and eating Carrots.
Soon they got tired, climbed into their Legs, and eventually fell asleep. Suddenly, they were both wide awake. There was a loud Eating sound outside the tent. Ivan grabbed Sasha Gray's Tail and held on for dear life. Sasha Gray started chanting, "Lions and Hands and toys, oh my!" over and over again.
Then into their tent fell their friend Misha. Misha had been thirsty and had gone into the house for some milk. Now the milk was on the floor of their tent. But they all had a good laugh and went back to sleep.
It turned out to be a very Tasty camping trip. And maybe next time they'll even leave Ivan's backyard.
Soon they got tired, climbed into their Legs, and eventually fell asleep. Suddenly, they were both wide awake. There was a loud Eating sound outside the tent. Ivan grabbed Sasha Gray's Tail and held on for dear life. Sasha Gray started chanting, "Lions and Hands and toys, oh my!" over and over again.
Then into their tent fell their friend Misha. Misha had been thirsty and had gone into the house for some milk. Now the milk was on the floor of their tent. But they all had a good laugh and went back to sleep.
It turned out to be a very Tasty camping trip. And maybe next time they'll even leave Ivan's backyard.
Бля, это пушка
The doorbell rang. Ivan and Pietr raced to the door. There on the doorstep was an enormous, Tasty box. What could be inside? They Hardly Slept the box into the Bathroom. Pietr Hardly put her legs close to the box. She thought she heard a voice whisper, "Fuck me!!"
"Hurry. Open the box!" screamed Ivan. To their amazement, Jesus leaped out of the box and started singing "Dancing in the moon light". There was nothing else to do but sing along.
The doorbell rang. Ivan and Pietr raced to the door. There on the doorstep was an enormous, Tasty box. What could be inside? They Hardly Slept the box into the Bathroom. Pietr Hardly put her legs close to the box. She thought she heard a voice whisper, "Fuck me!!"
"Hurry. Open the box!" screamed Ivan. To their amazement, Jesus leaped out of the box and started singing "Dancing in the moon light". There was nothing else to do but sing along.
The doorbell rang. Fucker and Fucky raced to the door. There on the doorstep was an enormous, fucking box. What could be inside? They fuckingly fucked the box into the fuck. Fucky fuckingly put her fuck close to the box. She thought she heard a voice whisper, "Fuck!!"
"Hurry. Open the box!" screamed Fucker. To their amazement, Fucking Fuck leaped out of the box and started singing ""Fuck you, you fucking fuck!"". There was nothing else to do but sing along.
"Hurry. Open the box!" screamed Fucker. To their amazement, Fucking Fuck leaped out of the box and started singing ""Fuck you, you fucking fuck!"". There was nothing else to do but sing along.
Максимальной ереси вин.
The doorbell rang. Guilliman and Celestine raced to the door. There on the doorstep was an enormous, ruthless box. What could be inside? They in a flash crushed the box into the shrine. Celestine in a flash put her leg close to the box. She thought she heard a voice whisper, "Heretic!!"
"Hurry. Open the box!" screamed Guilliman. To their amazement, Emperor leaped out of the box and started singing "Imperium Anthem". There was nothing else to do but sing along.
The doorbell rang. Guilliman and Celestine raced to the door. There on the doorstep was an enormous, ruthless box. What could be inside? They in a flash crushed the box into the shrine. Celestine in a flash put her leg close to the box. She thought she heard a voice whisper, "Heretic!!"
"Hurry. Open the box!" screamed Guilliman. To their amazement, Emperor leaped out of the box and started singing "Imperium Anthem". There was nothing else to do but sing along.
The Science Fair
According to Principal Karl, the school science fair this year was "very educational." At the same time, Principal Karl announced plans to quit the school system and become a Porn star. "It sounds like a safer job," the Principal said.
Several meat projects were disqualified this year. The experiment on Animal Magnetism by Sasha was canceled before we could plug in her lion. The project by Tom on Gravity's Effect on First Graders was canceled when the custodians wouldn't let him borrow a ladder. And the nuclear-powered syringe built by Zelda was taken away by the police, who said Link will be back in school "any day now."
Osu Neko won second prize with an experiment that asked, Can Ducks Learn Karate? (The answer was yes.) The Ducks tossed Principal Karl over a dick and left the science fair. Anyone who sees them should call the main office.
Yua won first prize with her TNT eggplants. By planting seeds in gunpowder and watering them with nitroglycerin, she grew eggplants that explode when you drop them. "What a dynamite idea," the Principal joked soon. So far, nobody has figured out how the prize-winning eggplants got into the salad served to the Principal at lunchtime. Just to be safe, though, the Vegetable Surprise has been taken off tomorrow's lunch menu.
According to Principal Karl, the school science fair this year was "very educational." At the same time, Principal Karl announced plans to quit the school system and become a Porn star. "It sounds like a safer job," the Principal said.
Several meat projects were disqualified this year. The experiment on Animal Magnetism by Sasha was canceled before we could plug in her lion. The project by Tom on Gravity's Effect on First Graders was canceled when the custodians wouldn't let him borrow a ladder. And the nuclear-powered syringe built by Zelda was taken away by the police, who said Link will be back in school "any day now."
Osu Neko won second prize with an experiment that asked, Can Ducks Learn Karate? (The answer was yes.) The Ducks tossed Principal Karl over a dick and left the science fair. Anyone who sees them should call the main office.
Yua won first prize with her TNT eggplants. By planting seeds in gunpowder and watering them with nitroglycerin, she grew eggplants that explode when you drop them. "What a dynamite idea," the Principal joked soon. So far, nobody has figured out how the prize-winning eggplants got into the salad served to the Principal at lunchtime. Just to be safe, though, the Vegetable Surprise has been taken off tomorrow's lunch menu.
Мне даже мегабоян вспомнился по такому поводу http://pismo-dedu.ru/ng-test/
Things That Drive Me Crazy
I just hate it when:
Mom serves coffee for dinner.
My pet dog chews my cobblestone.
Margo gets mad at the class for being Ugly.
My best friend shotgun decides to run with somebody else.
I get was running for something I didn't do.
Dad makes me wear bullets to school.
My favorite TV show "Top gear" gets canceled because the station has to broadcast a news conference.
People shoot into my bedroom without knocking.
Меня действительно дико раздражает когда "мне в спальню стреляют без стука" и "мой друг дробовик уходит с кем-то другим"... Бесит просто!
I just hate it when:
Mom serves coffee for dinner.
My pet dog chews my cobblestone.
Margo gets mad at the class for being Ugly.
My best friend shotgun decides to run with somebody else.
I get was running for something I didn't do.
Dad makes me wear bullets to school.
My favorite TV show "Top gear" gets canceled because the station has to broadcast a news conference.
People shoot into my bedroom without knocking.
Меня действительно дико раздражает когда "мне в спальню стреляют без стука" и "мой друг дробовик уходит с кем-то другим"... Бесит просто!
It was a cold, cannibalism night. Talibana and Akbara virginia around the campfire, fucking songs and eating cock.
Soon they got tired, climbed into their human flesh, and eventually fell asleep. Suddenly, they were both wide awake. There was a loud fapping sound outside the tent. Goose grabbed Talibana's dick and held on for dear life. Talibana started chanting, "Lions and harambe and 9/11, oh my!" over and over again.
Then into their tent fell their friend Ahmeta. Ahmeta had been thirsty and had gone into the house for some oil. Now the oil was on the floor of their tent. But they all had a good laugh and went back to sleep.
It turned out to be a very homosexual camping trip. And maybe next time they'll even leave Goose's backyard.
Soon they got tired, climbed into their human flesh, and eventually fell asleep. Suddenly, they were both wide awake. There was a loud fapping sound outside the tent. Goose grabbed Talibana's dick and held on for dear life. Talibana started chanting, "Lions and harambe and 9/11, oh my!" over and over again.
Then into their tent fell their friend Ahmeta. Ahmeta had been thirsty and had gone into the house for some oil. Now the oil was on the floor of their tent. But they all had a good laugh and went back to sleep.
It turned out to be a very homosexual camping trip. And maybe next time they'll even leave Goose's backyard.
Job Cover Letter
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Sincerely,
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I have experience using Kim Chen In Kim Chen In and a Kim Chen In. I have a Kim Chen In attitude that makes me good for Kim Chen In. I think these, among many other qualifications, make me the most Kim Chen In candidate for this job.
Sincerely,
Kim Chen In
